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      Sylvia told me that Madeleine Pickup always wore large hats when judging. So if you owned a dog that might be spooked by a large floppy hat, then you had to wear one to get the dog used to them. Which conjured up a delightful vision of breeders all over the country cleaning out their kennels, wearing beautiful flower and net creations on their heads. The thought moved me to compose the following.

 

 

They have scoured all the charity shops,

car boot and jumble sales.

The ladies look quite fetching in theirs,

not sure about the males.

 

Larry Yates has found a super one,

with the feather of a snipe,

a huge broad brim of crimson hue,

and somewhere to store his pipe.

 

Steve Cox has a wondrous creation,

in rainbow colours with a purple patch.

He likes it so very much he is,

looking for a handbag and shoes to match.

 

Bill Owen has one in bleary red,

in keeping with the colour of his eyes.

David Payne has surfed the internet,

but he canít find one he likes in his size.

 

Andrew Connolly looked and looked,

and tried on several types.

Then he found the perfect one,

featuring go faster stripes.

 

Sylvia K has an original one,

By the artistic David Schilling.

Every year for a few days over Ascot,

she lends it to Judy Pilling.

 

Percyís gives him a devil may care,

dashing air of what will be will be.

Not to be outdone Bill Carrier,

has stuck a flower on his trilby.

 

David and Sharonís feature a dragon,

with splashes of red and green.

John and Jill settled on a jaunty one,

the colour of Cornish cream.

 

Sheilaís hat is whiter than white,

to match her Essex shoes.

Oliveís is a delicate shade,

to suit her artistís muse.

 

Harry found a glamorous one,

and thinks he looks quite swanky.

Rose deflates his ego quickly,

comparing him to Widow Twankey.

 

Howard came across one in quite the latest style,

and was mighty pleased with his find.

Joan thinks it frightful, when they go to the kennels,

she makes him walk six steps behind.

 

Terry found one with feathers in abundance,

he thought it would do within reason.

Lily tells him when he wears it down the field,

to beware its not the shooting season.

 

Pam and Joyce have fabulous frothy net,

and peacock feather matching pair.

John and Betty have a plain straw boater,

with tartan ribbons that they share.

 

Tony Trantís one is a vision,

net and lace and flowers and feather.

Sandra puts him off wearing it,

he reminds her of his grandmother.

 

Oh! and mine is tatty with a faded rose,

showing signs of wear and tear.

Peterís looks as though a bird died on his head,

Oh! no sorry, thatís his hair.

 

                           Jean Hiscox.

 

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